Post Your Top Funny/stupid Sayings

[butcher]

Im looking for some funny sayings - Some will be selected and printed to decals and etc.

So post your cool, crazy or funny stuff now..

short is good..


EXAMPLE: Cheer up, the worst is yet to come.
Death is hereditary
I LOVE CHUCK NORRIS


Totally original stuff will be credited to you on the web page...

[Aero]

Aw fudgen nutter bars.
Hello Batman.

or my friends favorite:

FIDDLESTICKS!

[Scotty]

Went fishing yesterday and each fish i caught i told them England had lost the world cup, they were gutted.....

For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.

Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.

They say hard work never hurts anybody, but why take the chance.

Where there's a will, there are one hundred relatives.

You are totaly unique. Just like everyone else.

my own stupid thing - usually takes a while for people to figure out:

two wrongs don't make a right... But three lefts do

ok its sad i know but it always twists a conversation :)

[MitaPi]

Its a work in progress but for some reason it makes me laugh. I think I might make a bumper sticker out of it :P

http://i65.photobucket.com/albums/h237/MitaPi/AlphandRalph-ByMitaPi-1.jpg

[CanaBalistic]

British Columbian Drug Lords

Free Mark Emery

Under Conditions Of Peace The Warlike Man Attacks Himself.

Finger In Your Bum?

Got ROOT?

Are Thoes Carpet Burn's On Your Knees?

Do What You Want To The Girl But Leave Me Alone.

PC Marine: An Army Of One, Zero, Zero, One, One.

[Cevinzol]

"Slippery when wet"
"Wintermute"
"lemon curry?!"
"PWND"
"Sniper's Union local #657"
"Kevin Mitnik for President"
"Mostly Harmless"
"Pull my finger"
"Nuke em from orbit, its the only way to be sure."
"Smile, people think you're up to something"
"Caution: Electrons at work."
"Tux Lives."
"If it don't fit, use a larger hammer. If it broke, it needed fixing anyway."
"Its not your's 'til its modded."

[CanaBalistic]

MitaPi: WTF is up with that pic? It makes no sence at all...

[monoflap]

You know how it is when you walk your dog.
Thats a saying my mom says all the time:D.

[Slug Toy]

alright, ive got some good ones.


"he pretends to wave an egg"

"my crisp army" (was supposed to be microscopy)

"fungus doesnt snap"

"take away the people; take away the problem"

"squidcax"

"that better not be cheese in your hair"

"think big... no bigger than that."

"a million dollars? holy crap, thats like at least a thousand dollars!"

"ill tell you why lead iodide is yellow. because it has no self esteem."

"26, but i dont count."

"orange orbit of the squid"

"out from the landscape, the garden snaggle grandpa."


so that should do for now.

[Scotty]

"think big... no bigger than that."

"a million dollars? holy crap, thats like at least a thousand dollars!"




ROFL great

[nil8]

I have a tendency to curse like a sailor, so a lot of the things I say I can't say on here. I can only think of one that I can say without problems.

leetsauce.

[Scotty]

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[MitaPi]

MitaPi: WTF is up with that pic? It makes no sence at all...

Well its more of an inside joke more than anything but the fact that it doesnt make any sense is what is supposed to make you laugh. If it didnt make you laugh.. then just laugh because it is so completely stupid.

[simon275]

Sign out side of a school for disadvantaged children

SLOW
CHILDREN


"Where do pirates keep there bucaneers?"
"Under there buncan hat"

[tennysol]

Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free...and I will create an army to destroy you all!

5th place is 4th loser

You smell funny

Your parents will hate me Guaranteed

Stop hitting me or I will kill you in World of Warcraft

West Virginia - Inbreeding since...dunno can't count good

Trying is the first step towards failure...and I don't want to be a failure

MacGuyver = King of Modders

I hacked your computer...damn that's a lot of weird porn!

You don't have the Bawls

Come here and let me smack you

Vodka...the other clear drink

Your opinion has been noted...and sent to Homeland Security for Analysis

Your mom likes to be on top

The truth will set you free...lies will keep you from being imprisoned in the first place

I have a temporary restraining order against clothed females...so get naked

There are times that I am baffled...you for instance...I don't get it?

No Biting

You aren't my type, but I'll sleep with you...

Traditional Measure - 1 foot = 12 inches
Chuck Norris Measure - 1 foot = instant death

I can't remember where I live...take me home

In Star Trek you'd already be dead

Half of me wants to kick you...the other half is deciding which leg to use

There are plenty of people out there willing to help you...I am not one of those people

Stop Voting

(that enough or do you want more?)

[dgrmkrp]

homer always cracks me up:

i have a wife and kids... eat them!

got beer?

tennysol, these are sooo funny =))


I can't remember where I live...take me home

You aren't my type, but I'll sleep with you...

I have a temporary restraining order against clothed females...so get naked

can i use them as pick-up lines? :p

[Malatory]

Pirate Movies are rated AARRRGGGGGGG!

I don't give a fly rats A$$.

Slacker!!!

Carefull Code monkey fling poo

[tennysol]

tennysol, these are sooo funny =))
can i use them as pick-up lines? :p

If you think they'll work then by all means use them...just let me know how it turns out...:D

[butcher]

Haha, keep em coming ... I have added some to the site - mostly under funny decals..

or you can search your username in the search box and it should come up with your saying if i used it...

[MitaPi]

Traditional Measure - 1 foot = 12 inches
Chuck Norris Measure - 1 foot = instant death


That is my favorite one so far! If you guys make that one I will soo buy it! lol


Just on a side note... be careful of copyright infringement. I'm sure you already know all about that though.

[butcher]

yes there is definatly some we are going to have to remove.. we are reviewing agreements and licenses now.. Like Fox racing is a NO NO.. and i know some on there right now will not be there when the store is opened.. BUt on the most part companys dont mind = Free advertisment for them..


If anyone has any ideas.. it doesnt have to be funny just let me know..

[Razors Edge]

You're Mom works at Mcdonalds.

[.jrauck]

This is for eating at a restaurant: I went in feeling bad and I came out feeling worse. Just thought that is kinda funny. Ill try to think of more.

[tennysol]

(Part 2)

I'm reliable...half the time

Tag! You got bird flu!

Sin is god's way of telling us he doesn't like to have fun

I think my roommate is Al-Qaida

You're ruining the view!

You and Me NOW!...and I don't want excuses

Ask me about my bow hunting skills

Cheap Loser seeks Hot Model for Discreet Relationship

Please MTV....Pimp My Bride!

Arm the Homeless

Disease free since 19XX

Master Baiter

No I don't want to hear about your last boyfriend!

Biting off more than I can chew...right now.

I fought the law and the law LOST

Lumberjacks give me wood

I'm training to replace you

Lars

[qoou]

f*** you.

Master Debater

[Slug Toy]

im just wondering how hard it would be to get permission to take quotes from here: http://4q.cc/index.php?pid=fact&person=vin

that is some great stuff. i always laugh myself to sleep at night after visiting that site. imagine seeing bumper stickers with those quotes.


Tag! You got bird flu!

you know... just for the heck of it im saying this: the bird flu is total crap. just like west nile and SARS... its not that bad. its a flu, and is only dangerous to people with compromised immune systems or really large numbers for their age. for the average person, all three of those buggers are a minimal threat.

hack, youd have a better chance of being eaten by vin diesel...

[Cevinzol]

the bird flu is total crap. just like west nile and SARS... its not that bad. its a flu
Not to de-rail the thread but I have to disagree
Flu's are viruses.
Antibiotics don't affect them.
HIV is a virus
HPV (Human Pathaloma Virus) causes cervical cancer
SARS kills 1 in 10 who contract it (its also an STD)
Here are some stats from Wikipedia regarding Flu pandemics (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flu)
1918–20 – Spanish Flu, 500 million ill, at least 40 million died
1957–58 – Asian Flu, 1 to 1.5 million died
1968–69 – Hong Kong Flu, 3/4 to 1 million died

The thing about FLu epidemics is the best way to stop them is to keep them from starting.
That means to the poorly informed, a successfull stop can be misinterpreted as a false alarm.
/de-rail off

"my kid beat up your honor student"

Barenaked Ladies Kiss Loverboy

Police sting Doobie brothers

Pet shop boys poison stray cats

Pretenders free psychedelic furs

Mike & the mechanics fixx cars

Guess who styx blondie

[Omega]

If it ain't broke, fix it till' it is.

[Slug Toy]

Flu's are viruses.
Antibiotics don't affect them.
HIV is a virus
HPV (Human Pathaloma Virus) causes cervical cancer
SARS kills 1 in 10 who contract it (its also an STD)
Here are some stats from Wikipedia regarding Flu pandemics
1918–20 – Spanish Flu, 500 million ill, at least 40 million died
1957–58 – Asian Flu, 1 to 1.5 million died
1968–69 – Hong Kong Flu, 3/4 to 1 million died

ok yes, flus are viruses, and yes antibiotics are useless. thats a given. but come on, i wasnt going to drag HIV or HPV into this. those are in a different league altogether.

ill admit that the bird flu is one to watch right now because it has the makings of another pandemic candidate, but it hasnt mutated to the point where it can pass person to person. we're fine for now. heck, now that i think of it, all flus are pandemics... just not fatal ones except for old and really young people.

and yes SARS might kill 1 in 10, but thats of the people who are hospitalized. if you are between the ages of 12 and 70 and dont smoke and dont have any health issues... your symptoms will probably be much like a chest cold. in extreme yet non fatal cases there was some minor scarring of lung tissue, but its completely survivable for healthy people.

im not even starting in on west nile because thats the most hyped and least dangerous of them all. if you get west nile, you probably wouldnt know it unless you get blood tests.

we've had cases of SARS, west nile, norwalk, and hanta virus come through around here. i hear about it first hand because my mom is a pharmacist for a couple hospitals. there have been 0, i repeat, 0 fatalities for the first three. hanta virus... well thats a more serious one. its a hemmorhagic fever much like ebola or marburg.

thanks to the media, a lot of the viruses out today have been blown way out of proportion. then everyone starts believing it and things get even worse. you need to understand where and how viruses affect you to understand what threat level they pose.

derail-o-tron off...

"its a well known fact that YOU SUCK"

"its only tuesday if you know its tuesday. did you know its tuesday?"

"its opposite day... have a nice day"

"you look horrible, where did you come from?"

"if you can understand the embedded code in this phrase, the hospital is just down the road."

and by now what is a classic quote:

"this is the colbert report"