Satan Claus is Coming to Town

:santa:

Here's the deal. I'm going to treat four members to a special Christmas gift this year. Want to be one of those members? All you have to do is tell us the Naughtiest thing you've ever done and a single item you want that's no more than $50. If Satan Claus thinks you've been Naughty enough you'll be selected.

Here's the fine red print.

By item, I mean no more than one type of thing. Say you need a few sticks of RAM that total $50, that's fine. But if you want RAM and a heatsink, that won't work.

Your post should look like:
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The naughtiest thing I've done is.....

I want Satan Claus to send me....(Please provide exact link)
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Also, if you want something that has a mail in rebate offer, I WILL cut out any UPC codes for the rebate before I mail you anything.

Ends on Dec 1st!

So there you go. Get to it.:evil:

Time to do me some more thinkin'.

is this an Australian offer to?

ill get thinking to

Boy oh boy, "naughty" covers SO much territory....

I'd love to apply but I don't think I can without some kind of subcategory, sorry. I'll be watching the thread, though. :D
________
F1 640

If what we want is more than $50 would you consider a gift cetificate to the site the item is at and let us pay the difference? For example, I want an item that cost $114, I send you the link, you apply a gift certific to that specific site, and I pay the $64 difference? (sorry :santa: I have expencive taste! LOL!)

I like this game but somewhat I would submit may not pg so it would be best suited to be sent ina message or email. But I like the idea thus far

Dear Satan Claus,

As a young man ... hahah .. I worked as a driver for a British holiday company in France. The company offered camping holidays in pre-erected tents complete with beds, dining table, cooker and fridge etc.

My job was to deliver supplies to seventeen campsites in eastern/south eastern France and switzerland. Most of the English people who worked for my company and similar companies were young women of my age ... and there was a shortage of available men.

So I had at least one girlfriend on each of the seventeen campsites. They all knew each other and that I was with them all. On a couple of sites I was "timeshared". This came to a head when I was asked to make an extra delivery to an out of the way site in Switzerland that no one had visited for weeks. I was due a four day break so I thought I'd do the drive and take my break there.

When I got there I discovered ten women working on the site which only catered for young families. They had been there two months and had not seen an available man!

That evening I started getting drunk with the girls and quickly realised that several of them were preparing to pounce on me. I said goodnight and retreated to my small truck which had a bed in it to avoid the madness that was bound to follow if I had not.

About ten minutes later the door of the truck opened and a very giggly young woman called grace climbed into the truck, ripped off her clothes, got in my bed and snuggled up very close. "What are you doing here?" I asked.

"Well", she said, "after you left an argument started about who was going to sleep with you. All hell broke loose, and after a little while I came up with a plan".

"What's the plan?", I asked.

"We're going to take turns", she said, "as it's my plan I go first!"

For four days I was kept prisoner in my own truck by a crowd of sex starved young women .... so ... The naughtiest thing I have done is ... I willingly let it happen ;)

My other seventeeen+ g/f's were very understanding - after all they were used to sharing :)

EDIT: I want Satan Claus to send me: http://www.newegg.com/Product/Produc...82E16820211014

Matthew

wow that wouldve been one fun weekend XD

Quote:

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Originally Posted by gamer_from_aust

wow that wouldve been one fun weekend XD

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:up: yup - It was four days tho - I have a picture of the girls somewhere ... (digs around in cupboard) ...

:bunny: :bunny: :bunny: :bunny: :bunny: :bunny::bunny: :bunny: :bunny: :bunny:

Yup. That's the ones.

:P

lol as if that happened o_O but if it did then HIGH FIVE, VERY NICE you woulda been RECKED


the naughtiest thing that i have done (did it with killerman) is rickrolling the WHOLE school at once. heres the story...

every year, we have a school music shield, where each house has to come up with a performance involving as many house student as it can, and me and killerman came up with idea of rickrolling the whole school. we got a friend of ours thats a ranga (red head) to stand up on stage and start the act like he was telling some jokes, so hes up there and he says why did the chicken cross the road? and then the song cut in...

hes up there dancing like rick and we had people with red wigs on behind him dancing and he was wearing the whole big coat thing and was mouthing the words (remember theres about 900 people in our school, we are the biggest school in the southern hemisphere lol we own :) so yeah we made history by rickrolling like 900 people lol

killerman and i did not participate due to the fact that we where rolling on the floor pissn our selves laughing.


remember
50.00 USD = 75.6075 AUD
United States Dollars Australia Dollars
1 USD = 1.51215 AUD 1 AUD = 0.661310 USD


i would like satan claus

this times 3 is frist perference.... 2 for killerman one for me

http://www.pccasegear.com/index.php?...oducts_id=8022


OR

if not them these times 2
http://www.pccasegear.com/index.php?...oducts_id=7694


lol enjoy....
DonT-FeaR and KILLERMAN21

Quote:

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Originally Posted by DonT-FeaR

lol as if that happened o_O but if it did then HIGH FIVE, VERY NICE you woulda been RECKED

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It most certainly did - and I was not wrecked - they kept me well fed and gave me rest periods !

Quote:

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Originally Posted by DonT-FeaR

hes up there dancing like rick and we had people with red wigs on behind him dancing and he was wearing the whole big coat thing and was mouthing the words

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The funniest thing about that vid is that poor old rick is also SO obviously "mouthing the words".

CrazyB

Stickied. +rep TGS for being awesome!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by DonT-FeaR

is this an Australian offer to?

ill get thinking to

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Yes it is. I'll ship worldwide. I'm not doing certificates.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by TheGreatSatan

Yes it is. I'll ship worldwide. I'm not doing certificates.

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Hey no problem, it was just a x-mas wish...

Dear Satan Clause,
I have a been a naughty boy...I was very fortunate to have gone to a school in the US we called LAB schools. These were schools on university campuses that were primarily for the benefit of collage students that wanted to be teachers. The schools were extremely well equipped, at least a year ahead of the public schools and only for university faculty members children. Each class had a "homeroom" teacher and every semester we had a different student teacher teaching the class. During the 8th grade I had a student teacher in my science class that I had the proverbial "crush" on. At the time she was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. Needless to say, as a way to spend time with her, I needed a lot of extra attention after class understanding the lessons. Somehow the subject matter alway seemed to stray from the lessons and drifted toward more personal questions. During one of these sessions I came to find out her birthday way coming up very soon. I devised a plan to stay after class so I could give her a "Birthday" spanking. I really didn't care about the spanking, I just wanted to touch her fantastically curved bottom. When the big day arrived I asked her if she would stay after class and help me with the days lesson, she agreed, and I was nervous and excited through the hour long class. Once the class had ended, and we were left alone in the classroom, I asked her a few questions I really already knew the answers to, told her thank you I understood completely, and then said "by the way Happy Birthday!" Now only beeing in the 8th grade, I really hadn't had a lot of experience with women, so I wasn't very smooth. I just blurted out "Now it's time for your spanking!" I grabed her by the arm and started trying to spank her. To my surpirse she said "Hey, not here, meet me in my dorm room later this afternoon." I have no idea of what I learned the rest of the day as all I could think of was being alone in my teachers dorm room giving her a birthday spanking. Well the big moment arrived, I tried to pull myself together, tried to be cool, and knocked on her door. To be honest I didn't really expect her to be there, but to my surprise the door opened, and there she was. She invited me in and closed the door behind me. Boy you talk about being nervouse! We made some small talk and then I decide to make my move. I jjumped up and "OK time for your spanking"...she playfully ran around the room try to get away, but on one lap made sure she locked the door. Once the door was locked she let me catcher and I turned her over my knee and started to administer the birthday spanking. I slowly counted out each swat making sure to let my hand linger on her beautiful bottom at the end of every one, 1...,2...,3.../19...,20...,21...,22! and a pinch to grow on. Needless to say I was in heaven! To my surpise, once I finished, she rolled over and planted a big kiss right on my lips. Not one of those little school girl pecks, but a full blown, open mouth, tounge down the throat, french kiss. I couldn't believe what was happening! Things really started getting crazy from there. I reach up and started massaging her chest and she started rubbing my crotch! Forplay lasted, for what seem to me like hours, for several minutes. It wasn't long befor we were both naked and rolling around in her bed. If I need to tell you what happend next then you need more of a social life. In the end she made me promise to not tell anyone what had happened that day in her room. It's been over 38 years and I have kept that promise to her until I sat down and posted this to this forum. I have long since forgot her name, but I wiil never forget the lessons she taught me, and to this day reminnis about the time I was fortunate enough to spend with her.


I hope that's naughty enough for you Satan Clause, I would love it you would bring me one of these....
http://www.xoxide.com/logisys-twocolor-illumkeyboard.html

OMG the more I think about it the more I am remembering "naughty" things I have done. Some are very, very funny, some are very, very private, some I won't describe for legal reasons and frankly .... I'm struggling now to work out what the naughtiest PUBLISHABLE thing I have done is looooool

Are multiple naughties allowed Satan Claus?

Yours naughtily,

CrazyBuzzard

Are staff allowed to enter? If so..

When I was 15 my friends and I decided that there were too many 4 way stop signs in our town. So, one day, we thought we would help the City officials out and take it upon ourselves to change that. So, at the 4 way stop nearest my house, we removed one of the stop signs, effectively making it a 3 way stop. We took the sign back to my friends garage and stored it for a few days. The city promptly replaced the sign, but we weren't done yet. After about a week or so, we made a trip to the hardware store for some green and white spray paint, and a roll of masking tape. Not knowing anything about proper procedures for prepping a surface for paint, we proceeded to spray the sign completely white, masked out the word GO, and then painted the green on top of that. After removing the masking tape, we had a nice green stop sign shaped GO sign. After another day of waiting to make sure the paint was completely dry, we returned the sign with it's new paint to it's original home. Looking back, the results of that act could have been disastrous. Thankfully there were no accidents.

I would like:
http://www.newegg.com/Product/Produc...82E16814127367

Dear Satan Claus:

The naughtiest thing that I've ever done was actually about a week ago. I dorm at my college, and one of my roommates had recently been having a female friend sleep over. My other roommate and I were good-natured about it, but that good-naturedness evaporated instantly when I woke up one night to the sound of creaking metal. I said nothing that night, but I had a plan for the next time that happened. You see, I have one of those LED flashlights that can basically light up an entire room. It also has a momentary switch. As a consequence, it looks suspiciously like a camera flash when the switch is tapped. Anyway, I went to sleep with it the next time said female friend was over, and sure enough, I got woken up at about 3 in the morning. I quietly turned over and tapped the flashlight 2 or 3 times. From the residual images created by the flashes, I would have taken some pretty racy pictures had I been using a real camera. Much laughter by me and my other roommate ensued, as well as confused indignation on the part of my first roommate and his friend.

I want Satan Claus to send me: http://www.newegg.com/Product/Produc...82E16833124190

*edit*

I've noticed a trend also.

I hereby change my naughtiest thing to something of a non-sexual, non-illegal, PG rated nature. Maybe not the naughtiest, but certainly one of my funniest.

*******

Two friends and I went to Calgary to go to Zellers for some shopping one day. We were wandering around the store just generally being punks. (This was 1998, so I was 18)

We stopped in sporting goods, and started throwing arrows and stuff at each other. Basketballs, anything we could. Some lady was walking by, and she saw this, and started giving us hell for it. She really seemed angry, red face and all. So we just sort of walked away. As we were leaving the store, I stopped at the customer service desk and told the girl:

"There's some lady in sporting goods throwing stuff around, and yelling at people. She freaked out on us, so we are just getting out of here. I think she's drunk!"

"Thanks so much, we'll get someone to check on her." She turned away and picked up the phone, moments later we hear on the intercom, "Security to sporting goods, security to sporting goods."

Amazingly, this lady was there still picking up all this stuff, and still mad as hell. We were now sitting outside the store, waiting to see what would happen.

Seconds later, 2 security guards escort her out (by escort, I mean basically "carried") the door, to a stream of profanities and insults. She was just going off on these poor guys, about how they were ****ing idiots, etc.

We felt good. :)

I would like TGS to pray for my friend Danny if I win.

Dear Satan Claus,

The naughtiest thing I have ever done was back when I was 17. I had an 88 Caprice with a large backseat. A girl I hung out with kept telling me she wanted to be with a girl and that if I could arrange it she'd let me watch. So I talked to another female friend of mine who was actually planning on asking me if the first girl was bi. So I ask the first friend of mine if she liked the second girl and she did. So they agree that I can watch if I find a place for them to be alone. Well I convinced them to do it in the back of my car. I took them to a nice secluded place and I'm sure you can figure out what happened from there. I should also mention that both of these girls were amazingly hot.

I would like Satan Claus to send me: http://www.newegg.com/Product/Produc...82E16814121256

I've noted a slight trend with these stories.....

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Crazy Buddhist

Dear Satan Claus,

As a young man ... hahah .. I worked as a driver for a British holiday company in France. The company offered camping holidays in pre-erected tents complete with beds, dining table, cooker and fridge etc.

My job was to deliver supplies to seventeen campsites in eastern/south eastern France and switzerland. Most of the English people who worked for my company and similar companies were young women of my age ... and there was a shortage of available men.

So I had at least one girlfriend on each of the seventeen campsites. They all knew each other and that I was with them all. On a couple of sites I was "timeshared". This came to a head when I was asked to make an extra delivery to an out of the way site in Switzerland that no one had visited for weeks. I was due a four day break so I thought I'd do the drive and take my break there.

When I got there I discovered ten women working on the site which only catered for young families. They had been there two months and had not seen an available man!

That evening I started getting drunk with the girls and quickly realised that several of them were preparing to pounce on me. I said goodnight and retreated to my small truck which had a bed in it to avoid the madness that was bound to follow if I had not.

About ten minutes later the door of the truck opened and a very giggly young woman called grace climbed into the truck, ripped off her clothes, got in my bed and snuggled up very close. "What are you doing here?" I asked.

"Well", she said, "after you left an argument started about who was going to sleep with you. All hell broke loose, and after a little while I came up with a plan".

"What's the plan?", I asked.

"We're going to take turns", she said, "as it's my plan I go first!"

For four days I was kept prisoner in my own truck by a crowd of sex starved young women .... so ... The naughtiest thing I have done is ... I willingly let it happen ;)

My other seventeeen+ g/f's were very understanding - after all they were used to sharing :)

I want Satan Claus to send me: http://www.newegg.com/Product/Produc...82E16822148261

Matthew

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dude all i can say is that is absolutley ****ing awesome

Quote:

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Originally Posted by crenn

I've noted a slight trend with these stories.....

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HAHAHAHHAHAHA

Ask a bunch of (mainly) adult males to tell you naughty stories .. what else would you expect?

CrazyB

If another participant posts a link to another pop-up that I can't rid of without Ctrl Alt Del, like Don't-Fear, you will be barred from this competition!:mad:

Next, everyone is up to post, even staff. Your first post is your only entry, you can go back and edit, but not post another one.

A few people are posting $30 and $40 items. If you want a $30 video card, maybe you can find a better $50 one?

Man I must have lead a boring life if this is what I'm up against here. Well here's the naughty I have:

When my dad was stationed in WY I had a friend who seemed normal enough, he actually got me into computers. Anyway he would get those magazine adds that offered spy gear so we decided to order a basic set of lock picks and see what we could open with them. When he finally got them we tried assorted locks around the house, padlocks, deadbolts, basic door handle locks. We got that we could pick a dead bolt in 30 seconds. Well I don't know if anybody here has been to WY but nothing is usually happening at 1am most of the time so we were teenagers and bored. So we decided to see how many locks we could remove from various sheds around the trailer court. Never stole anything out of them just removed the locks. We did this for 3 days till we went to open house and there was some dude sitting on the back porch with a 12 gauge draped over his lap. We even went up to the middle school and started removing padlocks from different gates. This is where we almost screwed it up. While my friend was down on the ground removing a padlock from a gate designed to close the road during the summer a Cheyenne PD cruiser pulled up behind us. When I the car I made some quick thinking and told my friend to stuff the locks in his shoe and make like he was readjusting his shoe laces so they "wouldn't get caught in the chain." After a quick lesson on what time curfew was and a warning about getting home right away we were let go and we took off for his house as fast as we could. I think to this day all the padlocks still sit in his parents tool shed but I haven't talked to him in a few years. Honestly the "ball-o-locks" had to be 2' big and weighed a ton.

So there's my story. I don't have a dirty or stupid crazy story but please Satan Clause please bring me a :http://www.newegg.com/Product/Produc...82E16811996005

Well mines not crazy dirty like the others.....

It was a sunny day in California and I had taken my dads "bike" out. This bike happened to have a gas engine on the from wheel to give it power but my dad had souped it up to go FAST. OMG this thing hit like 25mph it was crazy. My dad lives in a fairly nice neighborhood in California and like I said I was out riding around and thought why not give some gas to it. So I go down to the end of one street and hit the gas as hard as I can so I reach the end of the road and realized that something had happened to the steering and that it was not turning very well and I ran into the neighbors nice silver 2006 porch. I scratched the hell out of it. Not some small scratched but some very large unwanted scratches on it. Whats even weirder is that the cops never came and they never tried to find who did it. Even more luckily I didn't do any damage to the bike or myself....LOL my father never found out it was me and I have never told my mom. It was the week before I was heading for home.

:santa: <--Click Santa!

sorry satan... i was saying that was what it was if you didnt know... sorry mate

Don't sweat it. Come on Jon, Paul, Cymae. More entries please!

i sense so much win in this thread

^Awesome!

The naughtiest thing I've done is.....quite a few years ago I meat a guy that was pretty cool and we became good friends. We would go to partys and try to see who could get the most chicks or who could do the most keg stands and all that. Other than parties and seeing each other at the mall we didnt hang out alot. But he wasa cool person to hang out with none the less. Well I was in town where he lived and was downa dn out so I went to the bar. As I sat there drowning my sorrows with my buddies Jack and Turkey I seen this rather good looking but older woman sitting about 3 seats down. She smiled and waved me down there. She was in her mid 40's or so. She was divorced and all as I found out from talking to her for about 2 hours. well I was liqoured up so beauty is in the eye of the beerholder right? So.. I grab my jacket and was going to have a try at couger hunting. Well I woke back up around 5 am in her bed, looked around, found my stuff around the house and promptly left. Had no clue where I was in this town so I had to stop at a gas station and get directions. Well I got outta there safely. About 2 weeks later I go back to Florence to go to the mall and pick up a game controlelr from gamestop and browse around. Well I meet this cute little chick working in the mall named Tina. We chit chat for a bit. I am nice and walk her to her car. As she gets in she asks if I want to go to the club with her? Well of course I do. We go out I think she is taking me to a local club in "other side of the tracks" area only to have her pull off behind some buildings and attack me. We went back to her place and wash rinse repeat. After it's all said and done around 2 am I said my goodbyes and we parted ways. About a month goes by and John calls me. He is installing some subs and stuff in his car and asks if I want to come over and help? Hell yeah I got something to do now. So I tell him I will grab some beer on the way up and when i get there I will
call to finish getting directions to his house. I get to Florence and I call him. He gives me directions and as I am going down there this feels creepily familiar but I write it off as dejavu. I pull up to the house and he is outside we chit chat for a sec and have a beer. Eye ball how everything is going to go. So we go inside to get tools and a cooler for the beer. As we walk inside I meet his mother and wanted to go hide ina hole. It's the cougar from about a month and a half ago. I greet her and shake her hand and all. We both give each other this solemn nod. She didnt know I was Bert that John went drinking with and I didnt know she was johns mom. So I go outside and swill down about 4 more beers. He is outside pulling the back seat and everything out and I go back inside to go to the bathroom. I speak with his mother and we agree that talking about it to him would be a bad idea and jsut to leave everythign lie like it is. I like this plan. So I go back outside and talking to John and next thing I know a car pulls up while I am under the dash running some rca cables. He yells he wants me to meet his fiance. SO I was like ok and pry myself out from under the dash. Stand up and hold out my hand to greet her and say HI I'm Robert but everyone calls me Bert only to be standing face to face with Tina. I smile and we talk for a moment. SO I ask how long have you two been together cuz I didnt know he had a gf. Well he is like oh yeha we been seeing each other for about 2 1/2 years. THey been engaged for about a month.I congradulate them and she goes inside as it is hot. AS she walks off she looks at me like dont say a damn word. I was thinking ok good she is going in the house. Then I relaized oh @#$% she is going in the house. So here I am witha good friend at his house isntalling a stereo and I find out all within 1 hour that I have boned his mom and his fiance. It was at that point in that I figured it was time for me to finish the install and leave. We finished up for the day and then I didnt dare go back int he hosue but John was like you not going to tell everyone goodbye. I walk back in to see both of them sitting at the kitchen bar staring at me . Turns out they talked about me to each other about this wild fling they had and ...well....1+1 and they were both like you did what with him. When everything was said and done they had realized I had slept with them both and John was none the wiser. It was made clear just to forget about it all and go on with our lives like it never happened. I was 21 at the time. About 2 years later I see John again. He and Tina had split. She left him for another guy. His mom had remarried. I could nt hold it anymore and broke down and told him. He just sits there, nods his head, and right hooks me. I stood up cuz I deserved it and we both knew it. That day was the last time we ever spoke.

I want Satan Claus to send me http://www.newegg.com/Product/Produc...82E16882237003

Wow. That was a damn fine story. Anyone up to steal Berticus Pryme's possible gift?

Dear Satan Claus,

I revised my wish list to this,
http://www.newegg.com/Product/Produc...82E16814121256

bert ... that sucks..

how long ago was this..?

what did he do and why dont ya call him... my still be cool??

lol nice story tho.... sucks how things work but it is a small world

All happened back in mid 03 and I told him in 05. I seen him about a year after that and he cut his eyes at me and turned around. I dont think he is still to happy bout it but I didnt know who the chicks were I thought I was just getting lucky. Oh well. Honestly if I had a chance to do it all over again I would have taken video instead of pictures. :twisted: hehehehe.

It's not your fault your so damn irresistably sexy!!

okay this isn't susposed to get me banned, but in second grade some asian kid told me about [a website for a magazine that contains adult content, but here's a hint: hugh hefner] and I went there....LOL I got in alot of deep ****...the class was screaming and flipping out when they saw it....
If I won id want CoD4 for the PC...LOL

heres the link COD4: http://www.newegg.com/Product/Produc...82E16832133049

Quote:

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Originally Posted by mittelmeier

Dear Satan Claus,

I revised my wish list to this,
http://www.newegg.com/Product/Produc...82E16814121256

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Edit your post to reflect this. When I judge, I'm just going to click on the link under the story so it better be what you want

Quote:

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Originally Posted by eslfish

okay this isn't susposed to get me banned, but in second grade some asian kid told me about [a website for a magazine that contains adult content, but here's a hint: hugh hefner] and I went there....LOL I got in alot of deep ****...the class was screaming and flipping out when they saw it....

If I won id want CoD4 for the PC...LOL

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You need to post a link to where the item is.

Personally, I think Bert wins.

I put a link in above

Here it goes:

One day (last year), my science class was working on power points for this huge project. Well, I was sitting in the back of the room and I could see the name of the computers (which our tech-guy had painted onto the side of the cases with white out). There was four rows and I could see the computers' names on rows: 2 and 4. So, I (being done with mine,) decided that it would be more fun to watch the others' confusion than to watch their power points. I opened up my cmd prompt and went to work, shutting them off one by one. What a glorious day, each person was dumbfounded when they saw the blank screens and one girl cried due to her lost work. Not that she was the only one who had lost their work, but she had worked so hard on making it perfect and hadn't saved since the day before. I fell somewhat remorse for the lost work of my classmates but it was too funny to actually not do it. I can't imagine what I would have done if I would have lost so much work like they did. I want Santa to bring me a:
http://www.tigerdirect.com/applicati...9&sku=D10-2400
$49.99 :)