Originally Posted by
FuzzyPlushroom
Plenty of room inside and under the hood, reasonably safe, mechanically reliable, available in good shape for around a grand, acceptable stock power and nearly unlimited build-up/swap options, rear-wheel-drive, invisible to the cops, and nice enough that a potential date's folks will probably approve...
...what you want is a Volvo 740/940 Turbo.
I'm not joking, and I speak from experience. (A naturally-aspirated car is a good call, too - slow enough to keep you out of trouble - as is a 240 if you live somewhere where rust isn't an issue.) If you get a wagon, the back seat will fold flat so that you and someone else can sleep comfortably (if you're both under six-foot-two or so).
Of course, this is easiest in the Northeast or Pacific Northwest, where people bought 'em in the first place.