Funny computing-term lines?

[Acey]

Heard a few but a while back saw this on my cousin's nick on MSN.

"Who is General Failure and why is he reading my hard disk?" I had to LOL.

[TheGreatSatan]

We have customers come in with faulty computers that I usually attribute to an IO problem. For some reason they never ask me what IO means.

Idiot Operator

[b4i7]

i like it when people call in with their laptop problems... every so often i get to tell someone to push the "fn" key....then they are all like uhh excuse me? no need to be talking like that

[Airbozo]

When I worked in systems support at Amoco Production in Denver, we had to fill out trouble tickets and enter in info as to what the problem/resolution was. We had to come up with a better term than stupid user or shouldn't touch computers. They were big into the acronyms so we started using PEBKAC. It slipped by for almost a year before anyone wanted an explanation. The IT manager fell off his chair when we told him what it meant;
Problem Exists Between Keyboard And Chair.

I got more...

[Luke122]

I once filled out a trouble ticket at Telus:

User doesnt think modem needs power to work. Need I say more?

My manager told me that while it was true and funny, FOIPP laws mean we need to be more careful about what we type in tickets since customers can request them.

I rewrote the ticket as "Customer is too stupid to plug in power."

He changed the ticket back to the original one and left it there.

[PartyLikeARockstar]

I cant believe that no one threw in the classic ID10T error yet.

I think call center tech support sees the best ones.

A customer called in one night about her cable. Irate and beyond consoling she said to my fiancee:

Why has no one called me yet? My cable has been out for 30 minutes, and I've been pushing the "help" button on the remote! I even tried morse code!

[halcyonforever]

Yeah we used ID-10T alot at Dish, it really only works on the phone because if you write it down it becomes apparent very quickly.

[ownaginatious]

I've always liked this one:

"Windows is a 32-bit extension of a 16-bit shell for an 8 bit operating system originally designed for a 4-bit processor by a 2-bit company that can't stand 1-bit of competition"

[XcOM]

that used to be in my sig,

IBM = I Blame Microsoft
Microsoft = Most Intelligent Customers Realize Our Software Only Fools Teenagers
Windows = Will Install Needless Data On Whole System
Windows = Well, It Never Does Operate With Speed
Apple = Arrogance Produces Profit-Losing Entity
Macintosh = Most Applications Crash; If Not, The Operating System Hangs

[The boy 4rm oz]

My mate called me cos his PC wasn't working, he had just moved into a new house so I told him to check the power point, it was turned on. I then told him to reach around the back of the PC and flick the PSU switch, when he did this I heard a loud BANG!!! My mate had flicked to voltage allocation switch on the back of the PSU and blew it up along with the $2000 PC I just built for him, I couldn't help but laugh.